Introduction
We have a delicate and personal topic before us this morning. My goal is for us to understand, in order for us to practice, proper Biblical sexuality.
For some of us, we may be a little wary of having sex preached from the pulpit. We are proper Southerners… and, this topic isn’t suited for polite company, such as church. To be honest, I would mostly agree with you on that – I do think that sex is a private matter between a husband and a wife. But, we have a problem - polite company is shrinking more and more every day… and as it shrinks, the other company is growing. And, you know what they are talking about? Sex. It is all over the mass media – it seems like almost every show on TV deals with sex in one way or another – and you know what? They aren’t promoting Biblical sexuality. It is in all the music my generation and younger listens to – and they aren’t promoting Biblical sexuality. It is all over the movies, radio, magazines and internet – and the vast majority of them are not promoting Biblical sexuality. The major voice in our world isn’t polite company and the church – the major voice in the world is mass entertainment, and they are seeking to destroy the idea of Biblical sexuality.
Case in point – one of the most popular TV shows ever was “Friends” – a show about a group of singles living in NYC. One of the major characters was a young lady named Rachel, who ended up getting pregnant out of wedlock. Someone did a study on the show, and found that over the course of the 10 year run of that show, Rachel had over 50 different sexual partners. Another popular show tells you its whole premise in its title – “Sex in the City” – a show about a group of women living in NYC who are sexually promiscuous.
The point being is that the world is talking about sex, and talking about it in an un-Biblical way, and they are steadily and systematically destroying the true identity of sexuality. The church’s silence isn’t helping the matter – our silence only allows the voices to be louder and clearer. As Christians, we need not be afraid of sex or talking about sex… the Bible is full of discussion about this topic, from the imagery used in the Song of Solomon to the practical wisdom in the book of Proverbs to the admonitions of Paul in his letters. Our God is not shy about talking about sex in the proper manner and context… and neither should we be. We need to gather together this morning and learn at the feet of our Father about how we need to think and act with this topic.
Creation Ordinance
As we begin our look into this topic, we need to recognize that the Bible does talk a good deal about sex, but we can only deal with a few passages this morning. We will begin with our Genesis passage.
Take notice where this passage appears in Genesis – it is in the story of creation. God created all things in the span of six days, and rested on the 7th. With our passage, we are in the 6th day – the day God created man. First, take notice of the basis of God creating man.
V. 26“Let us make man in our image, after our likeness.”
In this verse, the Triune God is having a conversation within himself, and He says that He will make man after his image. As our confession explains it to us, we are made in the image of God “in knowledge, righteousness, and holiness, with dominion over the creatures.” Dr. Johannes Vos explains this idea of being made in the image of God – “The image of man consists in man’s rational nature, man’s moral nature, and man’s spiritual nature… that man has a mind, a conscience and a capacity for knowing and loving God.”
We are made in the image of the holy and perfect God… and then notice the first directive that He gives to His created beings.
V. 28 “Be fruitful and multiply and fill the earth…”
The first thing that Adam and Eve were commanded to do after being created by God was to be sexually intimate with each other. They were not commanded to worship… to tithe… or anything else… the first command was for them to be intimate with each other. To some, that may seem strange and maybe even offensive. But, once we think about it, it really isn’t.
As I try to explain this, I would ask you to bear along with me as I take you through the logic of what I am trying to say. This idea I heard first from Joe Novenson, pastor of Lookout Mountain Presbyterian Church – and I need to give credit where credit is due! Man is created in the image of the Triune God – and it is within the Triune Godhead that we see the model of relationships. The Father, Son and Holy Spirit – one God, same in substance, equal in power and glory. These three are all in eternal relationship with each other – a relationship that is perfect in harmony, joy, love and peace. Scripture passages such as John 15.10 & Matthew 3.16-17 show us this perfect relationship. It is also within this Triune relationship that we see the perfect model of intimacy. You cannot be any closer than when you are one with each other – and that is the model we see in the Trinity – ultimate intimacy in their ultimate oneness. Father, Son and Holy Spirit – the three in one… the model of intimacy. And, it is from this model of intimacy that man and woman was made – and it is in that image that we have been molded. At no point can a man and woman be any closer to each other then when they are sexual with each other… when they literally become one. I would say that in our proper Biblical sexuality, we mirror the intimacy of our Triune Godhead. Now, I am not saying that the Triune God is sexual within Himself. The relationship of the Triune God is an intimate relationship, and He has created man to be intimate through sexual relations. And, when we can understand and grasp this, then it doesn’t seem so strange that the first command to the man and woman was for them to mirror the relationship of their Creator.
There is something else for us to understand also. The model of intimacy that we see in the Triune Godhead is practiced within the boundaries of the Father, Son and Holy Spirit. The same is true for us – our intimacy has boundaries. Sexuality is to be practiced within the bounds of marriage. That is how Adam and Eve were created. We see this in chapter two, where God creates Eve to be the helper of Adam.
2. 21-24So the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place with flesh. 22 And the rib that the LORD God had taken from the man he made into a woman and brought her to the man. 23 Then the man said, "This at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man." 24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.
God sets Adam and Eve within the context of a covenantal marriage, and then directs them to be intimate with each other. That is the process of this creation ordinance – that man and woman be married, and then, and only then, can they delve into the wonderful gift of sexual intimacy. The world seeks to distort that – and make intimacy an “any person, any situation” activity. However, from the beginning of time and creation, God has ordained that this gift be practiced within the boundaries of marriage. His intimacy has the boundaries of the Triune Godhead – so it would only make sense that boundaries would be set around his created image also. The boundary of our intimacy is that of marriage. Scripture makes it clear that sex is not meant for any other sort of relationship than marriage. Sexual intimacy is a part of God’s created order, and we must respect that.
Before we go to our next passage, let me mention one more thing. Many think that sex and sexuality is inherently dirty and borderline evil. Let me debunk that quickly. We are made in the image of God – and He created us to be sexual… if sex were sinful, then why would God create us to be sexual? He set man and woman in the garden, in the perfect paradise, where there dwelt no sin – and he commanded them to be sexual… if it were sinful, why would God command man to be intimate with woman in the midst of His beautiful and perfect paradise? Sex is not dirty or evil – it is a beautiful and precious gift that we need to protect. The world has taken this beautiful thing and corrupted it. But, sexuality practiced within the proper Biblical boundaries is a beautiful gift from God – for He created us to engage in it from the beginning of creation.
Positive From a Negative
Let us now turn our attention to the Exodus recording of the 7th commandment – “You shall not commit adultery”. Many people tend to notice one thing when they read this commandment – the negative aspect of it. You shall NOT commit adultery – they read it as if the “not” is in all capitals. We tend to look at just the negative side of this commandment – that we are being commanded to not do something. But, if we were to just focus on that aspect of it, then we will not understand the fullness of this commandment. What is the 6th commandment? “You shall not murder”. You know what the meaning is of that commandment? It isn’t just a directive for us to not kill anyone. No – the foundation of the 6th commandment is that life is good and precious, because life is a gift from God. We are commanded to not murder because of what life is – it is from God only and we need to take care of it and to protect it… it is a good and precious. The same premise is behind the 9th commandment – “You shall not bear false witness against your neighbor”… or, as some of us know it, “you shall not lie”. Why this commandment? Because of how precious truth is – that the foundation of the 9th commandment is to preserve truth and the way we handle truth.
This is all true for the 7th commandment – it isn’t just a directive from God for us not to do something. The basis of the commandment is how good and precious Biblical sexuality really is. It is meant to protect us and this gift. It is God knowing our tendencies – that in our fallen and broken nature we will ruin all that is good – and because of this, he sets up rules and boundaries to protect us and to protect this gift to us. It is him saying to us, “I know what sex really means, because I created it… and I know what really goes into it, because I gave it to you… so, I am giving you guidelines so you can get the most out of this.” This commandment isn’t meant to be a chain around our necks keeping us from the real fun of sexuality – like so many of us tend to believe. No, this commandment is meant to give us the full satisfaction and joy that sex is meant to be. It is when you take away this commandment and our faithfully obeying it that sex is destroyed from its original creation.
Look at all the perverse sexual practices of those who ignore God’s commands on it. The list of perversions is long and disgusting – and they all find their root in disobeying what God has commanded on sex. When we come to this commandment, we need to see it as a loving directive of our loving Father to protect us from destroying that which is inherently good and beautiful. It is the Father putting his arms around us and pointing us in the direction of total enjoyment of the precious gift that he has given to all married couples.
The 7th commandment is a command for us to enjoy proper Biblical sexuality as the Creator has defined it for his creation.
Achievement only in our Christ
As we talk about proper Biblical sexuality, there is one lynchpin that we cannot forget, and that is Jesus Christ. It is only when we are in covenant relationship with our Christ that we can enjoy sex for what it was created for. In Revelation 19, Christ’s relationship with his people is illustrated in terms of a marriage.
Revelation 19.6-8 Then I heard what seemed to be the voice of a great multitude, like the roar of many waters and like the sound of mighty peals of thunder, crying out, "Hallelujah! For the Lord our God the Almighty reigns. 7 Let us rejoice and exult and give him the glory, for the marriage of the Lamb has come, and his Bride has made herself ready; it was granted her to clothe herself with fine linen, bright and pure"- for the fine linen is the righteous deeds of the saints.
This is set in terms of a huge wedding feast, celebrating the eternal marriage of Christ and His church, the beautiful bride. So great is this event that John is instructed to write down the invitation.
19.9 And the angel said to me, "Write this: Blessed are those who are invited to the marriage supper of the Lamb." And he said to me, "These are the true words of God."
Blessed are those who are in covenant relationship with Jesus Christ, because they are the ones who will be eternally married to Christ. Blessed are those who are eternally in covenant with Jesus Christ, because they are the only ones who will fully understand what true intimacy is, because it is those who are in covenant with Christ that are forgiven of their sins, and the Spirit is set upon their hearts to help them understand and practice the ways of the Scriptures.
Sin and sinfulness has taken sex and destroyed it… and it is only in the cleansing blood of Christ can the true meaning of sexual intimacy be found.
One of the more powerful Psalms is Psalm 51, where David says things such as, “Have mercy on my, O God, according to your steadfast love… for I know my transgressions, and my sin is ever before me… purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean… restore to me the joy of your salvation, and uphold my with a willing spirit.” What caused David to write these words is his own sexual sin. He had an adulterous affair with Bathsheba, the wife of Urriah… and he fathered a child with her… to remedy the situation, he had Urriah killed during battle and took Bathsheba as his wife… Nathan, the prophet, eventually came to David and called him out on his sin. This sexual sin of adultery and fathering a child with another man’s wife – and what does David do? He turns to Jesus Christ – that is what Psalm 51 is about. He recognizes his sexual depravity, and turns to the cross and cries out to his God “Have mercy on me! Wash me thoroughly and cleanse me from my sin! Against you have I sinned… I was brought forth in iniquity, and in sin did my mother conceive me.” Why could David do this? How could he throw himself before God in such a way? Because he knew that Christ was covenantally loyal to him. He trusted faithfully in God for his salvation, and knew that the covenant of grace was the promise of his salvation. David knew that it was only God who could cleanse him from his sexual sin – so he turned to his covenantly loyal God and sought His forgiving mercy of God.
This morning, we are all guilty of some sort of sexual sin – either it be adultery… sex out of wedlock… lustful thoughts and eyes… immodest dress. We all sit in the pews as David, with our hands stained from sexual sins. We need to turn to the cross to find forgiveness and restoration – forgiveness for our sexual depravity, and restoration to Biblical sexuality. There may be some who have never trusted in God’s covenant with His people… this morning, I would call you to heed the promises of God and to find forgiveness, grace and mercy at the cross of His Son… come to this cross and be forgiven and restored. Many of us in here have trusted in God’s covenant – and this morning, I call you to be covenantally loyal to your Christ, just as loyal as he has been to you. Recognize your sin, return to the cross and be restored from your former sinful self. It is only when we live in the shadow of the cross of Jesus Christ that we can understand and practice Biblical sexuality – for it is only in the shadow of the cross that there is forgiveness from sins and restoration to the image of God. As we close, let me close with this story to help us see the forgiving grace of God, even in our sexual sins, and the call to proper Biblical sexuality.
Luke 7:37-38 (note: the woman of the city, a sinner, is commonly recognized as being a prosititute)37 And behold, a woman of the city, who was a sinner, when she learned that he was reclining at table in the Pharisee's house, brought an alabaster flask of ointment, 38 and standing behind him at his feet, weeping, she began to wet his feet with her tears and wiped them with the hair of her head and kissed his feet and anointed them with the ointment. 39 Now when the Pharisee who had invited him saw this, he said to himself, "If this man were a prophet, he would have known who and what sort of woman this is who is touching him, for she is a sinner."… 44 Then turning toward the woman Jesus said to Simon, "Do you see this woman? I entered your house; you gave me no water for my feet, but she has wet my feet with her tears and wiped them with her hair. 45 You gave me no kiss, but from the time I came in she has not ceased to kiss my feet. 46 You did not anoint my head with oil, but she has anointed my feet with ointment. 47 Therefore I tell you, her sins, which are many, are forgiven- for she loved much. But he who is forgiven little, loves little." 48 And he said to her, "Your sins are forgiven." 49 Then those who were at table with him began to say among themselves, "Who is this, who even forgives sins?" 50 And he said to the woman, "Your faith has saved you; go in peace."
May we too find the same forgiveness, and be reconciled to the cross, and be restored to a proper Biblical sexuality, and go in peace into the world.
Soli Deo Gloria
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